


Confidentially Issues

by The_Renegade



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Abduction, Alcohol, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alley Sex, Alternate Universe - Thieves, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Arrest, Attempted Kidnapping, Bisexual Dominick "Sonny" Carisi Jr., Blood, Blood and Gore, Booty Calls, Cabins, Children, Co-workers, Complicated Relationships, Confidence, Confinement, Confusion, Courtroom Drama, Courtship, Crimes & Criminals, Cute, Cute Ending, Danger, Dark Past, Death Threats, Detective Noir, Detectives, Drinking, F/M, Falling In Love, Fights, Fluff and Angst, Forests, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Gun Violence, Guns, Gunshot Wounds, Kidnapping, Loss of Trust, Love Confessions, Meet-Cute, Organized Crime, Past Abuse, Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Past Sexual Abuse, Past Violence, Phone Calls & Telephones, Pole Dancing, Police, Politics, Prison, Psychological Torture, Sad, Serial Killers, Threats, Threats of Violence, Trees, Trials, Trust Issues, Wonderful, bulletproof vest, complicated past
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-16
Updated: 2019-06-24
Packaged: 2019-09-06 23:04:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 11
Words: 15,937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16842256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Renegade/pseuds/The_Renegade
Summary: Daniel "Dani" Danvers never had an easy life. She knew early on what being the "V" in SVU meant. But her childhood only inspired her future career as a member of Olivia Benson's highly trained team. After all, who better to work for than the woman who had saved her eighteen years ago?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> As per usual, none of the canon characters or stories from Law and Order: SVU belong to me. I take no credit for anyone in this fic aside from my own original characters, currently including Dani Danvers. I make no profit from this and simply greatly enjoy this awesome story.

Dani shook the pack of cigarettes in her coat pocket anxiously. It had been three weeks since she had puffed one, and she didn't want to break it today. But today, of all days, was a day where she felt like she need one the most. Needed that nicotine to flood her system, make her brain fuzzy, take away a little bit of the pain. She sighed, leaning against the brick wall of her work building, staring up at the sky. She took the white and blue container out, rolling it over and over in her palm. She had told Benson she just needed to step out for a quick break. She couldn't be long. They had a case after all, that she was needed for. Of course, it just had to be on today. Of all days. She closed her eyes and flicked the lid of the small box open

"Aye, you really shouldn't be smokin those," a man's voice interrupted her thoughts, a thick Brooklyn accent breaking through the wall of angst that had surrounded her. Dani opened her eyes, dropping the pack discretely back into the pocket of her black leather jacket, and glancing over at where the voice had come from. A man, blonde, probably a little more than her own age of twenty six, stood there, hands on his hips. He was wearing a jacket, tan and long, and underneath, a suit and a thin blue tie. And a stupid mustache that Dani figured he was only using to make him look older. His blonde hair was slicked to the side, and he had a young air about him. He was staring at her, eyes going back and forth between the hand in her jacket pocket, and her brown eyes.

"What are you looking at?" She quipped back. No accent for her. Born and raised in Seattle. She moved away, as soon as she could. She looked him square in his blue eyes. "Really none of your business, what I do or don't do." She wasn't thinking about who he was, or what he was doing outside her place of work--people came there all the time, for all sorts of reasons. She was thinking about how someone had stopped her, stopped her when she was about to break her longest streak yet. But, what he didn't know, what he didn't even _think_ to know, that today, of all days, was not the day to get in Dani Danver's way.

"Just looking at a woman who wants to put a cancer stick in between her pretty lips," the guy grinned, nodding at her pocket. "No reason to be risking your life for something like that." 

Dani rolled her eyes, giving him the side eye once more. "Don't you know it's rude, not to mind your damn own business?" She asked flatly, taking the pack out of her pocket simply out of spite, shaking it a couple times, hearing the full pack rattle around. She hadn't even flipped a lucky yet. She hadn't even pulled off the shiny cellophane. So much temptation, in one little rectangular packet. 

"Woah, woah woah, take it easy," he threw his hands up, as if he were surrendering to her. "Didn't mean to step on any toes," and then he muttered something under his breath that she couldn't quite catch.

Dani sighed, shoving the pack back into her pocket. "You've ruined the mood anyways. Congrats," she scoffed, pushing past him, and through the door back into the 16th Precinct, letting the heavy door slam behind her. Of course, it had to be today. Of all fucking days.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dani trudged to her desk, the annoyance clearly displayed on her face. Dani had always worn her emotions like an article of clothing, clear and apparent to all around her. Of course, today was no different, as much as she tried to mask it.

"Hey, Dani, everyone good?" Amanda pushed back her rolling chair, looking over at Dani as the woman flopped down into her chair.

"Yea, fine. Just some prick on the street trying to tell me how to run my life." she rolled her eyes, tapping on the space bar of her keyboard twice, causing the screen to light up. "So, the usual for around here, ya know?" she glanced back over at Amanda Rollings, one of her closest friends since she moved here. Which wasn't saying much, seeing as Dani didn't really "do" close, and by friends she meant every now and then they saw a movie or exchanged books. Texted each other about stupid shit. Nothing all that endearing.

Amanda rolled her eyes. "Men. Shocker," she turned back to her own computer, picking up her cellphone and looking at a message that had popped up on the screen. She quickly sighed and swiped it away, only furthering the point of her previous comment. "Anyways, it's good that you're back in. The Boss is almost here, she's going to want a rundown of this morning." Ah yes, this morning. When they had gone to bring in an underage girl found with a very overaged man, one that Amaro had caught, while he was stuck on cop duty. When they were bringing her in, they got shot at. Dani, Amanda, and Fin. 

"Ah, yea, not too surprised on that one. Should we meet her at the door? Be on top of the ball today?" Dani asked, kicking her feet up on her desk and glancing over at Amanda. It was hard, today of all days, to make effort. Even harder when they were working on a case with kidnapped girls. At least, Fin had ended up getting the shooter and bringing him in. Silver linings. Well. He was in the hospital in the prison, in custody. 

"Yea, let's go. You got the file?" Amanda called back, already on her way to the hall. Dani held up the manila folder and gave it a small, affirming wave. It was time to get down to business.

It wasn't mere minutes that Olivia Benson, their Boss in charge of the Special Victims Unit, came briskly walking into the office, black handbag in the crook of her elbow. "Rollins, Danvers, let's hear the run down," she said, giving them each a nod in greeting. Dani wondered if she remembered what today was, aside from another day of SVU business. She wondered if she remembered all those years ago, a tiny brunette girl, locked away in a cabin in upstate New York. 

Dani shook her head, clearing out the memories. "The girl we brought in, her name is Luna," Dani nodded, answering Olivia's question. "She's waiting in Interview, whenever we're ready. She looks pretty....shaken up. I'm not sure how willing to talk she is right now." 

Detective Benson nodded. "Very understandable, she's has quite the morning, and that's only including the stuff we know about. Danvers, I want you in the interview room with me." She gave Dani a look of understanding, and Dani knew for sure that Olivia did remember, she did remember the events of eighteen years ago. Sweat pricked at her palms. 

"So," Olivia continued, "How did they knew where you were picking her up?" 

"Amaro," Rollins began, taking a deep breath, "Amaro thinks that they were followed from the moment they picked her up. He was...he was the leading officer on the case." 

Dani looked down at her feet as Amanda spoke. Nick was a touchy subject around the officer lately, what with his demotion to working the streets. And Dani knew how close Amanda and Nick had been, before. Before all of this happened. Before things started top get messy. 

"They shot at cops right outside of the station?" An all-too-familiar voice hit Dani's ears and she flinched, turning and looking behind her. "Must have wanted ya to know they're crazy." 

Dani froze, her eyes traveling past the shiny shoes on the floor all the way up to the man's face. "So you must be my new detective," she heard Olivia say, as she looked up and up, right into the face of the man from outside. Her eyes narrowed as she looked at him, closer now. The same exact man. New detective...no. Not this guy. 

"Dominick Carisi, Jr," he grinned down at Dani, chewing on a piece of gum as he stuck out one of his hands for her to shake, a silver watchband glinting in the lights above them. "You can call me Sonny."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter does have some depictions of violence and abduction that may be triggering for individuals.

_18 years ago_

Anna Danielle Danvers sat on a small, blue couch in her grandmother's living room, looking at her shoes. They were black and white, with Buzz Lightyear on the sides. They lit up when she walked. Her father had bought them for her as a present after her parents' divorce was finished, to show her he would still be around. That's what Daddy had promised, kneeling in front of the small girl, explaining they would get to spend one weekend together a month. One weekend. That was so little time, so far apart. That was what the divorce court had decided, they didn't ask the daughter for her input. She would have wanted more time. She would have wanted Daddy and Mom back together, she would have asked cupid to come down and hit them with their arrow again and make all the yelling stop. She would have wanted a happy family again. But her Mom stayed in their home in Seattle, and Daddy moved across the country to New York. This was her weekend to see him.

But it was Saturday morning and he wasn't here to pick her up. She had waited at the big bay window of the house that belonged to her grandmother (Grandma had gone to Bridge Club, whatever that was). Her Mom had flown out with her to New York from Seattle, so that she could see her dad. They had done this two times already and he always showed up. He was always on time, never late. His girlfriend, the weird one with the orange hair had shown up in her rusty, blue truck, looking like she had had one too many coffees. Her eyes were all bulgy and weird, and the little girl didn't like it. Her mother hadn't like it either. So she told Anna to stay on the couch and asked the lady to leave. To just leave her and her daughter alone. But the lady, she hadn't listened. They started yelling, louder than anything Anna remembered. 

The lady had pulled out a big, shiny knife, and she had stabbed Anna's mother, in the stomach. Lots and lots of times. There was so much blood everywhere. Anna had stayed on the couch, looking down at her sneakers, silently crying. The woman threatened her, said if she screamed she would be next. So Anna sat, hands in her lap, the little eight year old listening to her mother's last words, telling her everything would be okay, that it would be just fine. She didn't know what to do. She knew the logical thing was to call 911. That was what people told her to do in emergencies, and this was an emergency. But the lady...her Daddy's girlfriend, had that big knife, and Anna knew if she did the wrong thing, she'd end up on the kitchen floor with her Mom. 

And she was scared. Really scared. The last time she remembered being this scared...she thought there was a scary monster living in her closet. That was two years ago. And this trumped that, by a lot. So she sat on the couch and waited, waited for the lady to tell her what she wanted her to do next. She hadn't been in the living room for a few minutes but Anna dared not get up or move a muscle. She was too scared that if she moved, she would be killed. She didn't want to die. Her class was supposed to go on a trip to the zoo in two weeks. The Seattle Zoo! That was a big deal. She didn't want to miss it. But she couldn't go now...now cause her Mom couldn't sign her permission slip.

She wanted to cry but she was too scared to do it. Suddenly there were footsteps. Anna looked up from her shoes and her Daddy's girlfriend was standing there, holding her blue backpack. It looked really full. "Alright, little one, you and I are going on a road trip. Then your Daddy is going to come get ya, okay?" she grinned this crazy big grin. "I've got your stuff all packed already, so lets go to the car. You've already got your shoes on, so that's good." 

Anna Danvers got up and followed the lady, who still held the knife. They walked right past her mother's body on the floor, as if she wasn't even there. Anna didn't dare look back. 

Anna sat, buckled in, on the passenger side of the truck as they drove quickly along the highway, disappearing up, up, into the trees as they drove. Anna didn't recognize any of her surroundings here, but the trees were nice. She wanted to ask where they were going, but the knife was still in the car. Not for long. After there were no cars on the road, her Daddy's girlfriend rolled down the window and chucked the knife into a ditch. Anna watched it go sailing away. She was a little less scared now. Only a little. 

"Where are we going?" She asked quietly, looking down at her shoes again, hands in her lap. She was scared to look up at the woman, the woman who hurt her mom. 

"Well, sweetie, we're going to this big cabin up in the woods. I think you'll like it. Lot's of cute deer. No one to bother us. Then your Daddy will come visit, won't that be nice?" The lady replied, and Anna saw her squeeze the steering wheel out of the corner of her eyes. 

"Yea," she replied quietly. "I am supposed to see him today. I'm excited to see him, I don't see him a lot." She looked out the window, watching the landscape wiz by. Her Daddy was coming. He would make this all right. Even if he didn't love her Mom any more, he would never ever let anyone hurt her, Anna was pretty sure of that. He would make everything all better again. Then she could go home to Seattle, cause she wasn't really sure she liked New York all that much. 

After a while, they stopped at a gas station. "I need to pee," Anna said quietly, looking over at the orange haired lady for the first time. "Can I?" She undid her seatbelt hopefully, ready to slide out of the car. 

The orange lady looked at the gas pump, then back at that girl, sighing. "Yea, that's fine. Just don't talk to anyone. Just in and out, okay?" Anna nodded, tugging at the winter cap on her head, pulling it snug over her ears. 

The eight year old walked quietly into the gas station and into the bathroom. She didn't look at the girl behind the register, she didn't look at any of the customers in the store. She wondered if there was a place she could hide here, but she was still scared. What if the lady had another knife? Or what if she hurt her Daddy? She couldn't let that happen. 

So she went the bathroom, she washed her hands, and she started to walk back out of the store, when she saw the camera. It was up in the corner, and little, with a itty bitty red light blinking. One on, one off, one on, one off. She looked up at the camera and waved, frowning. She watched that little red light blink as she lifted her winter cap off her head and dropped it to the floor. Bread crumbs, for when her grandma came looking. Someone would look for her, right? 

Then she breezed out the door, long brown hair flowing out behind her, now that it was free from the hat. She was hoping the lady would be too busy to notice it was missing. If she noticed, Anna would have to lie. She had never been a very good liar. Her emotions always had a way of playing on her face.


	3. Chapter 3

_Present Date_

"You?" Dani asked, raising an eyebrow, looking at his hand, which she was decidedly not shaking. She glanced back over at Liv. "Why is he here?" She asked her Boss, eyes flicking back over towards the man with annoyance. There was no reason for a man like _him_ to be parading around their office. And not today, not today of all days. Today was not the day to be on her bad side.

"Well, Detective Danvers, remember that request I put in? For an experienced, empathetic detective to join our squad?" Olivia answered, looking Sonny up and down, "I'm guessing this is him." 

"Yes, M'am," Sonny grinned, "Experienced, as request, and I've got sensitive and moody sides too. Can really rock the whole 'empathy' thing." He shoved his hands back into his pockets, trying to casually play off the fact that the woman from outside, Detective Danvers, hadn't even accepted a handshake. What _was_ her problem exactly? All he had done was try and give her some healthy advise, pretty sure he hadn't overstepped his bounds. He just wanted to make a good impression here, stop bouncing around between jobs.

"Great," Dani muttered to herself before brushing past them, "Just need to grab a few things from my desk," she called out over her shoulder, stuffing her hands into her jacket pockets once more. Not today, not today, not today. She shoved the memories deep into the back of her mind. She had work to do, she could let it out later. This was going to be a long couple months of flashbacks and painful memories, after all. If she didn't get herself straightened out now, she'd be a wreck the next coming weeks. Reaching her desk, she took a deep breath, leaning on the wood. She grabbed an ibuprofen from her drawer and swallowed it with her coffee. Then she grabbed her pen and notepad, turning around and plastering a thin smile on her lips, looking back at Liv. "Let's do this," she muttered to herself, walking forward and towards the interview room.

Interview was one of Dani's least and most liked locations at work. It was a delicate balance of like and dislike. On one hand, so many terrible, horrible stories were shared in the small, brick room with one window and a desk, with that one way mirror on the other side. But on the other hand, the room was a beacon of truth. Answers; found. Stories; brought to the light. It was a tangled web, but it was her web. They had the power to find the truth, if they worked hard enough. 

"Hey Carisi," Olivia called out at the two women headed towards Interview, "You're with us on this one. Follow my lead or you'll be right back through the revolving door, got it?" 

"Loud and clear," Sonny replied, cracking his knuckles as he followed the women. All he wanted was a chance to prove himself, and this interview, this might be that very chance. He would pull out all the stops, show them that he was worth having around. Dani wasn't so sure she wanted him there, interrupting her balance of like and dislike. Teetering the scales, that one was. But for the sake of her job, she would put up with it, especially right now. She needed Liv to know she could still handle her job during this time of the year. 

So, politely, Dani held open the door for Sonny, watching him evenly as she did so. But, surprisingly, he held his hands up in protest. When she raised one eyebrow at him, he simply replied, "Ladies first, chivalry ain't dead, ya know?" and gave her a cheesy grin. Dani rolled her eyes at him, but as she turned to enter, she smirked, just ever so slightly. He was still and idiot though.

Dani took a seat away from the desk, letting Sonny sit beside Liv this time. Learn the ropes on his first day and what not. She would take notes, speak when she felt needed. She crossed one black pant leg over the other and tucked her pen behind her ear, looking at the young girl in front of her. The girl, Luna, young, Latino, beautiful curly hair, had been brought in by one of the bookies. She was still wearing the same sparkly crop top and a floral skirt that she had been wearing when they scooped her up. Dani wondered if she was cold. She had a feeling she was, but didn't want to say anything. 

"Liv, give me two seconds, okay?" she said with a small smile and a nod, getting back up out of the room and grabbing one of the blankets they kept in the locker space, for exactly this reason. The large navy square would warm her up, and hopefully help gain some trust. When she quietly entered Interview, Sonny and Liv had already started speaking with her. Liv turned around at the sound of the door and gave her a grim look, nodding her head towards Carisi, who was currently speaking. 

Dani gently offered her the blanket and a small smile, before sitting back in her seat, watching Sonny as he spoke to the girl, who was wrapping the blanket around her like a shroud. 

"I want you to get this into your head. That was no warning shot back there. Your Papi green lit your ass, they're going to keep coming for you until they _find_ you," he hit his index finger down on the desk in front of them, causing Luna to jump slightly, her brown eyes widening. Dani's mouth dropped open as she stared at Sonny. What the actual _fuck_ was his plan here? "Here's the thing," he continued on, leaning back in his chair now and crossing his arms over his chest. "I've got a pretty good idea of how this situation is going to go down. You've only got one good option. T-nonimmigrant status for trafficked girls. You get a new name, new identity, and the keys to the United States." He eyed her, picking at one of his nails as he did so. "I can help you with that. I've got some friends in high places, can pull some strings. But you've got to be willing to make a statement for us." 

Luna looked at him, then at Liv, then back at Dani, her eyes landing on the woman who had given her the blanket. "Is he telling the truth? Can you help?" 

Dani sighed, tugging at one of her sleeves, before looking in the eyes. "We can help you Luna, but we need you to help us. Work with us, please." While she disagreed with everything that Sonny had just pretended to offer (how would _he_ have the power to get her T status?), they did need Luna to trust them, to help them help her. She'd have it out with him later. All she needed to do now was keep the anger from flashing over her eyes. So she broke her gaze from Luna and picked up her paper, scribbling away fake notes. 

"Alright everyone, lets give Luna a moment to think and we'll go grab her something to drink, yea?" Olivia suggested. Dani didn't have to be told twice. She nodded, grabbing her notepad and sliding out of the room, before her emotions gave her away to Luna. From outside, she would never hear what Dani said, never hear it when she gave Sonny a piece of her mind. First day there and he already thinks he can run the interview session? And make false promises? 

When they were out in the hall, Liv sighed. "That was a pretty bold move," She addressed Carisi. "Promising her T status like that, when we both know you don't have the pull." 

Dani whirled around to face him, the anger finally blazing across her face. "What are you, some kind of immigration lawyer?" Liv's eyes widened, and she looked back and forth between the two. 

"Working on it. Taking night classes at Fordham Law," he smiled, still chewing that piece of gum in his left cheek. "I did a paper, last term, studying T Non-immigrant status. Luna's a perfect candidate." 

Dani scoffed, crossing her arms over her chest. "What, you write one paper and now you're the expert? What do you think is going to happen when she finds out we can't do a damn thing to get her what you promised?" She was angry. Livid. Especially today. That poor girl was probably swooped up from her home, away from her family. 

"Doesn't matter, cause right now she believes me. And right now, she's talking, she's telling us we need to know," Sonny defended himself. Was this girl always so damn angry? From the moment they had met, it was like she disliked him, for no good reason at all. 

Dani sighed, pushing back her brown hair from her forehead, shaking her head at him. "That's where you're wrong Sonny, it matters. It matters every time." she dropped her arms to her side and turned back around. "I'm taking a smoke break," she stopped at her desk, grabbing the small blue box, rubbing the cellophane on it nervously. "This time, I don't want any lectures, thanks." The door banged shut behind her, leaving Sonny Carisi Jr thinking about what she had just said.


	4. Chapter 4

Outside, Dani tapped the pack anxiously against her thigh, she hadn't even gotten as far as opening the box, pulling off the shiny plastic. Every time she tried, all she could picture was Sonny Carisi’s stupid voice telling her not to stick a cancer stick between her red lips. Her _pretty_ lips, is what he had (annoyingly) said. Stupid. A flirt, for sure. She was quite certain the entire office would confirm that over the next week. 

Frustrated, she shoved the pack back into her pocket and took out her iPhone, pulling up an unread message from Johnny, her most recent boyfriend. Things were a little on the rocky side of the relationship right now, she had been freezing him out for a bit. All he could talk about recently was how in the future, she’d give up her job and become a housewife and mother. Not exactly Dani’s sort of lifestyle. Not exactly something she would ever be able to do. If she didn't have work, she would lose her mind. Especially during times like these. How could he expect her to sit at home watching children when her mind was itching and she didn't even remember what it was like to have a parent? Not that he could expect her to do anything. He didn't know, about her past. Of course he didn't, that wasn't the point. But she wanted someone to talk to right now, so she pulled up that stupid unread message.

_Come on, Dani. How long are ya gonna keep me in the doghouse?_

Forever, she thought to herself, but she didn't type it. And she could. Keep him on read forever. It'd be no loss to her. The nice thing about Johnny, though, was that he wasn't in her job field, so she never had to bring work home. And there was no chance of him knowing why today had her so fucked up. She knew he would never spend hours pouring over case files, because he didn't have access to them to begin with. It was an easy, comfortable balance. He didn't ask questions, so she didn't answer them. Ever.

Then again, he didn't ask questions. He never seemed to care about who she was, who she used to be, how she got to where she was today. If he was on a game show and the million dollar question was "what town did Dani Danvers grow up in?" he would lose the money right there. Hands down. Because she knew for damn sure he had never asked her about her home life.

Dani sighed and thumbed out a quick, easy text. _Busy day. Busy week. Maybe drinks later?"_

It sure didn't take him long to reply. It never did. It was like he was constantly waiting for that little message box to tick to one, for Dani's name to pop up on his screen. Like a Labrador. It was a little weird, honestly. A little too needy for her liking, but at least she knew if she sent out a text it wouldn't just be forever floating out there in the ether, living in the land of no response. He had never kept her on read. So yea, there were a few things she tolerated about Johnny. But did the good really outweigh the bad? She shoved her phone back into her pocket, next to the unopened packet of cigarettes. If he could survive her today, then, maybe, maybe the good won.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Work had always been something that helped Dani make it through the day, especially on days like today. These next few months would be the ones that would be the hardest of the year, and they were, every single year. Every single year at this time, her coworkers all noticed how suddenly passionate the normally laid-back and sarcastic brunette became, throwing herself into cases which an uncharacteristic zeal. Today was going to be no different, even if she had to interact with the man who had royally gotten on her bad side. If that was what Liv wanted her to do, she would do it. 

So she found Liv, Fin, Amanda, and Sonny as soon as she came back inside (nicotine craving still unfulfilled), hoping for good news. "So, get anything while I was gone?" She asked, sliding up beside them, fingertips hanging just inside the front lips of her jean pockets. "Burst the case wide open?" 

"I got the location of the house she's workin out of," Sonny said with a nod, mostly addressing Liv as he spoke. "Think it's good intell. Who do we get a warrant from?" He seemed just as hyped to find some work to do as Dani felt on the inside.

"Hold your horses, Carisi, you've got nothing. We've already busted houses before, and we got nothing for it," Liv cut him off with a shake of her head. "There's something bigger going on here, and we need to get to the bottom of it instead of just busting another house. I want to put a complete end to this." Dani knew this one was personal for her. She had adopted the son of one of the girls who had been killed by this prostitution ring.

"What if," Amanda suggested, finger tapping at her chin, "We did a bust on the house, but also with a UC inside? Someone they don't recognize who can get the details before we make the bust?" It was a good suggestion, Dani nodded to show her agreement. The academy had been putting out a ton of high quality UCs lately. They could be useful.

"Alright, send me in," Sonny volunteered, hoping that if he was able to succeed at this, it'd cement his place on the squad. Things were still a little too frosty for his liking. "They've never seen my face before, to them I'll be just another John looking for some action." 

Dani rolled her eyes. Something about his eagerness dug under her skin and bit down. He was too happy. He reminded her of a puppy, leaping up for attention. 

"No," Liv shot down his suggestion immediately. "First, let's send in someone they _do_ recognize. Someone they know has a pretty heavy grudge against SVU. And someone we know well enough to trust." Dani saw the frown on Sonny's face after the last remark and felt just the tiniest bit bad for finding him annoying. He was on his first day after all. A tad over eager, but trying to earn his place. But all thoughts of that were chased away as Liv suggested they recruit Nick Amaro to help the team. 

"I'll call Nick and explain the job," Liv said, finished with the conversation. "The rest of you can return to your work while I go meet DA Barba and get other details sorted out," she looked down at her phone as she spoke, tapping away a message. Dani didn't need further information or orders to return to her desk, she just did it. 

Sitting down, she tapped a couple keys and opened her computer back up. Her email inbox had one message left unread. Opening the screen, she saw it was an email from her brother with a news website link it in. The subject was "Hey Sis, we made the news again!" Dani put her head in her hands for a moment, taking a deep breath. Of course Freddie had sent her some stupid fucking news article. As much as she loved him, he could be annoying as all hell. That's just how little brothers were. 

Freddie Danvers was 21, an adult in college, and Dani knew very well that bringing the traumatic situation of their childhood back up to her was his way of coping. He couldn't keep it all bottled up. He needed to release his thoughts out into the open air and let someone hear them. He needed to ask questions. He needed to understand. He had only been three at the time, so of course he didn't remember all of it. But he remembered what had come afterwords. He had lived it, right along side her.

She started to drag the email into the trash bin, but hesitated, and in that moment, the curiosity got the better of her. She tapped the link twice, the story pulling up on her screen in front of her. **Eighteenth Anniversary of the Tragic Danvers Murder-Kidnapping. Ways to Keep Your Children Safe!** read the big, bold title. And beneath it was a picture of young Dani and young Freddie sitting on a bench, looking somber inside the courthouse while a trial went on behind the big set of wooden doors. She remembered that photo being taken. It had been plastered everywhere during the court case. She looked like a wildling, hair dangling down to her knees, bags beneath her eyes from being unable to sleep. 

Not evening wanting to read further, she clicked the little red 'X' button, the screen in front of her disappearing. She pulled her phone out from her pocket and typed up a quick message to her brother. 

_Funny email. Miss you. x_

And she hit send, knowing he was probably in class right now, or playing basketball with his friends. What she did know was that it was nearly time for her shift to be over, and there was a bar across the street from her brownstone that was calling her name. She needed a drink, and she needed it badly. But first, she needed to get out of these clothes.


	5. Chapter 5

_Seventeen years, eleven months, and twenty days ago_

Anna woke up in the same bed she had slept in for the past ten days. It wasn't her bed, it didn't have her stuffed animals. And she didn't like it one bit. But she didn't have a choice though, because the mean lady with the weapons was still there and she had killed her mom and she didn't even know where she was, just that it was up in a forest somewhere, somewhere she didn't recognize one bit. Her Daddy was supposed to be coming for her. That's what the lady had said over and over again, but he still hadn't shown up yet. So she was alone and scared and she didn't like it one bit.

She didn't understand where she was or why she was here. She didn't understand why her dad wasn't there with her. She wanted to see him. Wanted to see her little brother. She wanted to be literally anywhere else than where she was right in that moment. But there was no way for her to get away. There were woods everywhere. And any smart kid knew that in woods there were bears. Anna didn't really want to see a bear in real life. Then again, maybe he would be a friendly bear and help lead her out of the trees and back to her grandma's house. It didn't seem likely though.

Every day was the same for her. She would get up. The scary lady would give her breakfast. She would watch tv on a grainy old boxy tv that the cabin had. She would draw for a little while. And then she would get fed dinner and she would go back to sleep. She never got to leave, she never got to do much of anything, except eat and watch tv. And tv got boring once the growup shows came on. Once, the news had come on and she thought she saw a picture of herself, but the lady had switched it off too quickly for her to know for sure.

But this day, things started off differently. The lady, her Daddy’s girlfriend, crouched down in front of her, looking her in the eyes. Anna thought her eyes were weirdly red, but didn’t comment on it. She was scared to say anything around her, anything at all. She was scared if she opened her mouth she would wind up dead. That a knife would come out and jam into her stomach.

"Alright, Anna, I need to go into town quick to get some more food for us," The lady said, looking her intensely in the eyes, nodding as she spoke, causing the little girl to mimic her, nodding back. "That way, we can keep eating until your Dad gets here, which should be soon if he paid attention to the things I left behind for him."

"Left behind?" the little girl whispered. "Like a treasure map? With pirates?" Her eyes went wide at the thought, even though she was afraid. She had always loved pirates. Sailing the seas in a big boat sounded like the kind of adventure she would be interested in. First bears, now pirates. If the lady hadn't hurt her mom, this may have even been fun. 

"Exactly like a treasure map," the lady smiled, revealing a row of yellow teeth and foul breath. "But if we don't want to spoil the surprise at the end of the map, you need to stay hidden away in here until he shows up, okay? Just watch the cartoons until I get back." The little girl nodded, her long, tangled strands of brown hair tumbling about her shoulders as she did so. This just reminded the woman she needed to pick up a hairbrush for her. Couldn't have her looking like a ruffian _if_ they were ever spotted. That wouldn't bode well for anyone involved.

And then the lady left, and Anna was really, truly alone. She didn't know for how long. When she heard the car drive completely away, she opened the front door and stepped outside. The air was crisp and cold and it cut against her sweater with every gust of breeze. The trees around her were mostly pine trees, tall and green. The earth looked untouched by people. The cabin they were in seemed to be the only thing for miles. She stared out into that woods and she wondered if it was safer to run, or safer to stay. She didn't know where she was, she didn't know these woods. She didn't know how to get home, or how to find a place to call for help. But she did know that her Daddy was coming for her. The lady had left a treasure map, and her Daddy was a smart man. He would find a way to get to her. 

So instead of making a break for it, tearing out into the wilderness to survive or die, she turned around and went back inside, sat on the couch, and watched tv until the lady returned. She thought back to that moment many times in the next coming weeks. About how she should have ran. About how if she had died in the woods, maybe it would have been for the best.


	6. Chapter 6

_Present Day_

The trip Dani had made home was a quick one. She had showered and changed into a pair of black skinny jeans and a low cut, flowy grey tank top, pulling on a pair of black combat boots and a leather jacket as her final touches. She wasn't looking to impress anyone, but if she was able to get some free drinks, that'd be a bonus. It helped that she lived close to work, too. The time it took her to get there from home was minuscule. And she could walk to the bar from her apartment and not had to waste money on a cab. It was an overall good deal for herself. Plus, that way Amanda could come visit her once she finished up for the day, too. 

When she got there, Dani ordered a Long Island, paired with a shot of rum that she immediately downed, feeling the burn of the liquor hot on her throat, chasing away the thoughts of her past, pushing them far behind her, right where they belonged. All she wanted now was some alcohol to erase her bad day, and for Amanda to come join her in her escapades. Then she would all it a night, go home and drink some water, and be ready to go the next day for work. Surely things would be ramping up with this case they had in front of them. It was the perfect time for Dani to throw herself all in to her work.

But first she would throw herself all into drinking. Probably end up at home, crying, but that was fine. She had had plenty of nights like those. Surely there were more to come. She took a long swig of the Long Island Iced Tea, enjoying the lemonadey flavor, enjoying how she couldn't taste the copious amounts of liquor she was swallowing at that moment. After she swallowed the liquid she looked up at the bartender and requested another shot. He obliged, pouring out the silver liquid into the small glass for her. She took it from him with a flirtatious grin, then knocked the shot back, swallowing it all in one quick go. She licked her lips as she looked back at the man behind the bar, with his muscly arms and sandy redish hair. He was cute, enough, for the night. She would flirt with him enough to get a free drink or two, and maybe make out with him in the parking lot if Johnny bailed. Which, seeing as he hadn't texted her since earlier that day, odds were pretty likely. 

Maybe it was the wrong thing to do. It was _definitely_ the wrong thing to do. But she needed to do everything she could to not _feel_ anything. 

She slipped her phone out of her pocket and looked down at the messages. Still radio silence from Johnny. She pulled up their message conversation, staring at the screen for a moment, then started to type a message, before she stopped herself. He wasn't the person she needed here right now. She closed the message and opened up her strand with Amanda.

 _Hey, I'm down at the Black Rose if you want to come meet me. Drinking away the pain or whatever._

She sent the message quickly, then took another sip of her drink. Sure, Amanda didn't know all the details of her past, didn't need to. But she did know a little something about drinking away the pain. She felt confident that Amanda wouldn't say no. Suddenly her phone buzzed with a new message. She drank the rest of the Long Island and motioned for another round as she looked at her phone. 

_Not sure, Dani. Been a long day..._

She frowned at Amanda's response, which was an abnormal one. Usually, Amanda would be right there by her side, even if it was just to make sure she didn't hurt herself.

Taking another shot, she let the booze fuel her message that she rapidly typed, then retyped to avoid any spelling mistakes the liquor had made. 

_Come on, Amanda. We all need to relax. You and I can play a game ;)_

A fun game. A betting game. The kind the two girls always wound up playing at whatever bar they wound up at. Each would make a "bet", aka say a phrase that they thought would come true. Then the one who made the bet would take a drink. The other person would drink if they also thought it was a valid bet. They only used six shots, and the one with the most left 'lost.' Honestly it was mostly just an excuse to drink.

_Fine, I'll be there. Don't get too much of a headstart without me._

Amanda's response came quick, as Dani knew it would. She smiled over at the bartender who slid another drink her way. She laughed at him, the booze already making her head fuzzy to the point where she knew she wasn't making the best of choices. But everything would be fine, as long as she didn't think about the events of eighteen years past.

Amanda dropped in a drink later, to see Dani leaning over the bar chatting animatedly with the man behind the bar who was barely staring at her eyes and mostly staring down her shirt. Amanda sighed, feeling a little sorry for the guy who had requested to tag along and join them at the bar. She looked over her shoulder at Sonny Carisi, who had asked to come with. Team bonding or something. He was going to regret this, she was pretty sure. 

"Apologies in advance," Amanda muttered to him, marching over towards the bar and pulling Dani back into her seat. "I see you started without me," she drawled.

Dani propped her elbow up on the bar. "Just a few," she laughed, sliding a shot towards Amanda. "I see you brought a friend," her gaze flickered over to Sonny, and actually gave him a grin. He looked at her with surprise for a moment, before he grinned back. "Hi Sonny," She practically purred, "Come to drink with your office mates?" She grabbed another shot from the array in front of her, handing it to him, a little bit of liquid sloshing over the sides as she took his hand and wrapped his fingers around the glass. "Smart choice."

He looked down at her, this woman who had seemed to treat him with so much spite earlier that day, who had acted as if she hated the fact he was around. She was now the one smiling up at him and buying him drinks, looking as happy as can be that he was there with them. He took the drink and gave her a nod of thanks. 

Dani returned to her barstool perch beside Amanda, showcasing her array of shots. "Alright, I've prepared the playing field. The match has been set. Are we playing against one another, or is Carisi making this a threesome?" She winked over at the guy, a blush flooding across his cheeks causing her to laugh.

"I'll just watch the two of ya, for now," he said, pulling up a stool to sit beside them, giving the bartender a nod in greeting. The guy back there seemed less enthusiastic that there was another guy there now, but still served the beer that Sonny requested. 

"Same rules as always?" Dani asked Amanda, holding a shot in one of her thin hands, raising an eyebrow to the woman who was both her teammate and opponent in this situation. 

"Same rules," Amanda agreed, and then the two clinked their glasses together. Amanda made the first bet. "I bet that Mr Bartender here gives you his number," she drank her shot. Dani shook her head but downed hers as well, grin on her face.

"That was an easy one," Dani said, as they each picked up their next glass. "I bet that Nick tries to call you tonight, and that you answer it," she knocked back her shot as she dared Amanda to say she wouldn't answer. Bravely, the blonde held onto her shot, slim smile on her lips.

"You know I won't answer it, you basically just gave yourself a drink," Amanda laughed. Dani shook her head, the look on her face saying she didn't believe Amanda for a second, which was good because Amanda was lying through her teeth. "I bet that Johnny doesn't show up next time you ask him to meet up at a bar, again." Dani winced. That one hit hard. Both of the women drank. 

Carisi shook his head and excused himself from the game for a moment, getting up and making his way to the restroom. Dani watched him go, her eyes trailing his body through the crowd. 

"Alright," she picked up her next drink, almost missing as she went to grab it, fully intoxicated at this point. Her head was like a fishbowl, underwater and blurry. "I bet that I can get Carisi to make out with me tonight," she grinned and knocked back the shot. Amanda shook her head, but took her shot as well.

"Well," she tagged on, picking up another drink quickly, countering her previous statement, "I'll raise, and say if you do, you fall for him," she drank the shot evenly, looking at Dani's blanched face the entire time. The brunette set her shot down on the table, hard enough for some of the drink to spill over.

"You're joking," she challenged Amanda, who simply shook her empty shot glass at her, as Carisi made his was back and sat on the stool behind them. Dani nearly fell off her seat and he placed a hand on her lower back to steady her. Her gaze flicked to him, then back to Amanda, eyes narrowing. "I'll raise your raise, I bet you I don't. And I'll prove it," she downed a shot, slamming the glass back to the wooden bar. 

Amanda crossed her arms over her chest and shook her head, smirking. "I'd like to see you try. I've always been a bettin girl, you know that Danvers. How often do I lose?" 

"Hope you're ready to start," Dani quipped back, nearly falling off her stool again. She stood up, turning to the bartender, "Can I close my tab?" He obliged, handing her a receipt to sign, and then her own copy. As Amanda had bet, his number was scribbled on there. She shook her head and shoved the receipt in her bag. "I should head home," she slurred, stepping backwards and bumping into Carisi's knee. She whirled around, nearly falling again, causing Amanda to let out a tipsy laugh, the alcohol also hitting her, as Dani practically fell into Sonny's lap, the man's eyes wide as he reached out to stabilize her. 

"Careful, doll," he said, helping her standing up straight, standing beside her. "I think ya heading home is a good plan right now, we've got a big day of work tomorrow." His look of concern made her a little upset. She could handle herself, she was just fine.

"Yea, yea, I'll walk up a couple blocks and be there," she laughed, pushing against his shoulders lightly. She turned to Amanda and pulled her into a hug. "Thanks for coming out, babe."

"Any time, Dani. You know I've got your back," Amanda returned her hug, then let her go. "But hey, don't you have a bet to finish before you leave?" She grinned, nodding towards Carisi. 

She asked this at the same time as Sonny spoke up, "Wait, walk home? No, no, no, that's not going to happen. I'll drive ya," he offered to Dani. "A woman like you, in this condition? I can't let ya walk home alone in the dark like this. A lotta pricks out there, we all know that too well." He held out a hand for Dani to take. 

Dani rolled her eyes, but took his hands, his feeling large and warm as it wrapped over hers. "I'll keep you updated," Dani said to Amanda, now feeling like she couldn't go through with it. Here he was, being so nice to her, for no reason. She hadn't been friendly to him at all. She'd been the exact opposite, but she couldn't let herself think about why she had acted that way. She was doing so well at pushing away the bad thoughts. So well. She couldn't let them back into her now. She squeezed Sonny's hand, pulling close to him as he weeded them through the crowd. As they made it to the door, he shrugged off his jacket, wrapping it over her bare shoulders.

"Here, wouldn't want you to get cold," he whispered to her, and she could feel his breath against her ear. 

She stopped turning to look up at him. "Why are you doing this?" She asked, him, point blank, though her words didn't come out as sharp or direct as she would have liked. But they were words, which was a plus. "Why are you being so nice to me? I'm not a nice person." He looked down her and there was almost a sadness in his eyes.

"Cause I know what it's like," he replied, "To not be treated all that nice, a lot. I don't want anyone else to feel that way, doll. Especially not someone who looks like she's already hurtin." He squeezed her hand, and pulled her out of the door of the bar and into the cold. The wind hit her like a punch to the gut and she stopped, letting go of his hand and leaning against the wall, taking deep breaths. Maybe, maybe she had had too much to drink. He stopped leaning against the wall beside her, studying her closely. "Yea, let's get ya home." 

She looked over at him, and in that moment, she did it. She turned to him, cupping his head in her hands, and she pressed her lips to his. She wouldn't remember it in the morning. Hopefully he wouldn't acknowledge it. But she did it, one small kiss, soft and sweet. Like butterfly wings on his lips, and she tasted like vanilla. She pulled away before he could try and kiss her back. "Take me home," she said softly as she pulled away.

He looked at her and took her hand once more, leading her wobbling body towards his car. He opened the door for her, tucked her in, and made sure her seat belt was fastened. By the time he had made it to the driver's side and turned on the car, she was fast asleep, head leaning against the window. He sighed, reaching over and rifling through her purse until he found a wallet, not wanting to wake her. He looked at her wallet, glancing down at her ID, reading the name on it. A name he recognized, and not just because it was that of a coworker. He looked from the ID, over to the girl sleeping in his car. And then it clicked.


	7. Chapter 7

_Seventeen Years, ten months, and eighteen days ago_

Young Anna was watching TV when it happened. The lady came storming in from the room she wasn't allowed to go in, presumably her bedroom, ranting and raving and her hair all a mess of tangled knots. She was literally foaming at the mouth. She came running at Anna and grabbed her by the arm, yanking her off the couch as the young girl cried out, the sudden wrenching shooting pain up her arm as the skin on her wrist twisted and burned.

"Stop!" She cried out, "That hurts! You're hurting me!" Tears started to stream down her face as the mean lady yanked her downstairs, into the basement of the cabin, where it was dark, and where Anna was pretty sure there were spiders. She did _not_ like spiders. They were scary and crawly and they had weird hair and she did not like them one bit.

"Shut the fuck _up_ , you little brat!" The lady screeched, tumbling her down the last four stairs so Anna landed in a pile at the foot of them, sobbing. The lady pulled duck tape from her back pocket and tore off a piece, wrapping it over Anna's mouth. "There. Quiet. Much fucking better," the lady muttered to herself, glaring down at the child. This whole thing was starting to get so damn annoying, the girl's father still hadn't shown up or even tried to contact her. So she was going to have to make things a little more....desperate.

The basement was nothing but a concrete block with several foundation poles. In the center of the square room was a manhole cover, leading down to the sewage below. Against the right walls were a washer and dryer. The only light came from a small, dangling bulb that she turned on with a yank on a silver chain; there were no windows.

She dragged the muffled crying girl, who was limp like a ragdoll, over towards a foundation pole in the middle of the cement room. Holding the girls arms up, she wrapped the girls wrists to the pole with the duck tape, making sure they were nice and tight. Perfect. She pulled her phone out of her back pocket and flipped it open. It was time to make a little film. One her day would certainly see. One that everyone would see, and know that she meant fucking business. A sickening smirk slid over the woman's chapped lips. Oh yes, they would know she meant business alright.

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Dani didn't really remember getting home. She didn't remember the man who carried her so effortlessly up the stairs, or how he made her drink at least a bottle of water so that she wouldn't be too dehydrated in the morning. She didn't remember how gently he had tucked her in to her bed and left her to rest. 

What she did recognize when she woke up in the morning was the smell of bacon, toast, eggs, the sizzle of something on a hot pan. She sat straight up in bed, then immediately let out a groan of pain as her dull headache hit. It was light, but it was still there. She looked at her bedside table, and there was a glass of water with ice cubes in it. She reached over cautiously and sipped out of it, staring nervously at the doorway. Who was on the other side? Who was in her kitchen, cooking breakfast food? Who had helped her into her comfiest pajamas? She glanced at the empty mattress beside her. It didn't look slept in.

She slid out of bed quietly, and put on her warm slippers, white and fuzzy, a gift from an ex some time ago. She kept them for the comfort, not for the memories. Carefully, she cracked open the door from her bedroom that led out into the hall, then out to the kitchen and living room. She heard a man humming softly to himself, a song she didn't recognize. She brushed backed her hair, sure it looked snarly and terrible, sure that she had bags under her eyes right now. Might as well face the music. Might as well terrify this man who had come home with her - though she was confident she hadn't slept with him. She would have remembered something like that.

She stepped around the corner, into the sunlight that beamed through the kitchen windows. "Hey look," She started, speaking to the mans back. He was wearing a pair of sweatpants that hung ever so loosely around his hips, grey, and a white t-shirt. "Thanks for cooking or whatever but you gotta go-" the last word caught tight in her throat. The man turned, putting a piece of crispy bacon between his lips as he leaned against her kitchen counter. Sonny Carisi. Was standing in her kitchen. Making her breakfast. Wearing _pajamas_. For the first time in a long time, she was dumbstruck. How the hell? "What..What are you doing here?" she asked finally, still just standing there in the middle of her living space, staring at him.

Sonny grinned, crewing on the bacon and swallowing. "Don't you remember? Ya invited me home, were begging me to sleep in your bed, but being the gentleman I am, obviously I said no. I slept on the couch." He stared at her shocked face for a moment before laughing. "I'm just yankin your chain, none of that happened. You did fall asleep in my car though, while I was drivin ya home. So I carried you upstairs, put you to bed, and by then it was pretty damn late so I crashed on your couch. Hope that's alright. Just didn't feel good about leaving your door unlocked on my way out. Figured cooking breakfast might make up for taking up your space."

Dani stared at him, still open mouthed. Still speechless. Finally she just shook her head and sat down at her kitchen island, as he set down a plate in front of her, eggs over easy, bacon, buttered toast. He slid a glass of water her way as well. The food looked annoyingly good. Dani had never been much of a good cook. Having food made for her, first thing in the morning, wasn't the worst thing she had ever woken up to. Still, this made work awkward. He had slept in her house. She didn't like people coming into her space. Johnny had never even been there, she only ever went to his place if they were going to spend the night together. 

And here was a man, a man who she had only met a day before, standing in her kitchen like he had always been there. He seemed like he could find anything in the kitchen, like he had organized her cupboards himself. And it made her all sorts of uncomfortable. To make matters worse, her phone chimed. She grabbed it off the charger on the kitchen counter (he must have plugged it in for her), and Johnny's name appeared on the screen. She flipped it over, setting it back on the counter. She didn't really want anything to do with him today. He had bailed again last night, not the first time in a long string of times where he had bailed out on evenings out. As far as she was considering things, he was back in the doghouse. One more strike and she'd consider him out all together. She didn't need him around, not really. His benefit was his attentiveness, and that had been wavering recently. That and he could handle her crazy. He could handle her moodswings, the way she wouldn't go into basements ever, even if it meant ditching restaurants or clubs for a different venue.

"Thanks," she said finally, after eating her eggs. "I appreciate it, really. Where'd you learn to cook like this?" she motioned down at the food with her fork.

"Oh, my Ma and I have always cooked together. She's always said any man worth his salt knows his way around the kitchen," he smiled as he spoke, his eyes drifting away as if he was in a completely different place, and she watched as his memories tugged at him for a moment. "Anyways, I took that to heart. Always loved cooking, especially cooking for others." He smiled over at her, watching her eat. "Finish up, then we can head to work. I just gotta grab a change of clothes out of my car." He nodded towards the doorway. 

"You care a spare change of clothes everywhere you go?" She raised an eyebrow at him, mockingly, but in a friendly way. Banter. She was joking with him. This caught Sonny off guard. 

"Yea, well, ya know. Gotta be prepared for anything," He shrugged, hands in the pockets of his sweats. "I'll be right back, you take your time getting ready." 

She watched him walk out of the kitchen, slipping on his jacket that was hanging by her front door, like it, too, had always been there. He looked like he belonged in her apartment, and it was unsettling. She watched him walk out the door, then threw the rest of her breakfast in the garbage. She needed to shower if she was going to be heading into work on time.


	8. Chapter 8

"Go on in," Dani told Sonny when he parked behind their place of work. She held up her unopened pack of cigarettes, shaking it a couple times to intend she was going to take a smoke break before heading in. Really, she just didn't want people to see them heading in together, especially not Amanda. She was pretty sure Amanda probably didn't remember their bet from last night, but, better safe than sorry. She didn't need him knowing that, though. He had been nice enough for now, so she would take away a day of not being completely shitty to him.

She looked down at her phone and saw an unread message from Johnny. Without opening it, she could see the beginnings of an apology text. Whatever. Who needed him, anyways? There were plenty of men in New York, she didn't have to waste her time waiting on some loser who couldn't keep a date and wanted her to be a housewife. She never expected Johnny to be around long term, hell, she didn't _do_ long term. She just short, chaotic, and then cut off. So this wouldn't be any different. Dani had never been one to _do_ relationships anyways. She broke things down when they got too good, because if she didn't destroy them herself, the odds were they would get destroyed by the universe eventually. 

That was Murphy's Law, right? Anything that could happen, would. She knew that far too well. Might as well have called it Dani's Law. She sighed, swiping away the message and clearing out her screen. Some good old fashioned ghosting would give him the hint. And if it didn't she would type something up later about how it wasn't working for her anymore. She shoved the cigarettes back into the pocket of her navy blue suede jacket, followed by her phone, glancing at her watch as she did so. She should probably head inside before people thought she was late. Surely, they'd have work to do today. Nick should have been making the meeting with Joaquin today and then they would make the bust.

She sighed, looking out at the street, watching the cars speed by for a moment, before collecting herself and heading back inside. If anything, she had paperwork to get caught up on. Maybe she could go speak with Luna, work on building the trust a little more. Dani was good at that, building trust between kids who had been taken from their families. Yea, sure, maybe it was hard for her. But she was damn good at it. And there weren't a lot of things Dani knew she was that good at. 

Walking briskly into the office, she saw Amanda already at her desk, typing away, and as she got closer, she could see the bags under her friend's eyes. She wasn't the only one who had suffered the wrath of last night's expedition, and as sad as it was, Dani was slightly comforted by that. "Morning," She greeted, and as she walked by, Amanda held up a white coffee cup for her, Dani's name clearly scribbled on the side in sharpie. Dani grabbed it swiftly, sitting down in her desk and taking a big gulp of the hot liquid. Caramel mocha, one extra pump of caramel. Just how she liked. She let out a "Mmmm," of satisfaction, looking at Amanda with a grin of thanks. Amanda knew her too well, knowing that to function, Dani would need a large cup of her favourite brew. 

"So, any news on the bust?" Dani asked, looking over at Amanda once more, kicking her feet up on the corner of her desk as she leaned far, far back in her chair. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Sonny Carisi, see that he was staring right at her. His gaze was practically boring into her, like hot metal on her skin, but she didn't dare turn to look. To shake off the shiver running down her spine, she tugged uncomfortably at the sleeve of her white button up. 

"Nah, Nick is supposed to do the meet later this afternoon, then the bust tonight," Amanda shrugged, finishing up a quick email and hitting 'send,' before turning to face Dani. "So it'll probably be more desk work until tonight. Or prepping for the bust, going over blueprints, the whole deal." 

Dani nodded in understanding. "I think it's a solid plan. Gains trust, and that'll get us intel down the road. And we can save some girls tonight." She added at the end, thinking of how true that statement really was. Yea, the intel would be good. It'd help them in the longrun, but tonight they also had the chance to change some lives. Bring some girls home, who may have been missing for years. And as she said it, she realized how much she needed a win like that. Something to keep her grounded this month, remind her that that life was behind her, too. She couldn't change her own past, but she could change the future for these kids.

"Yup, going to be a long night," Amanda nodded, sipping out of her own coffee cup before tossing the empty container into a nearby recycling. "Better get anything done you need to before this evening because we'll be out for a while, no time for phone calls or anything," Amanda gave her a knowing look, questioning if Dani would be calling Johnny any time today.

Dani shook her head, no. "Ehh, there won't be anything to worry about there. That's all done with," she explained as much as she could without actually explaining. She gave Amanda a knowing glance. Johnny wasn't going to _be_ around to be a problem, not anymore. Amanda nodded, turning back to her desk. She knew enough to know when Dani was done talking, and this morning, the signs were clear.

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The rest of Dani's day was spent at her desk, following up on old case reports, answering emails, typing up various itemized lists. The plan had been set for them, they were all getting their gear on at 7, vests and everything, and then they would bust the house. Joaquin would try and escape, and then they'd see if he took Nick's bait or not. Hopefully he'd fall hook, line, and sinker. 

As Dani was working on a response to an email from someone down in Processing regarding evidence she had dropped off last month, an IM popped up in her lower right hand corner. _Dominic Carisi Jr has sent you a message!_ the little glowing bar read. Rolling her eyes, Dani sighed and clicked it, opening up the chat.

 _So, who does Rollins think you should be calling tonight?_ the IM read. Dani started typing and then stopped. Did she owe him an answer? No, not really. Her relationships outside of work were none of his business, even if he did crash on her couch after driving her home from a bar last night. 

_Just an ex, who I won't be calling_ she finally typed back, hitting send before she could talk herself out of it. Telling him that much wasn't _really_ giving him too much personal information, right? Everyone had exes. It wasn't like she was the only person in the world ever told not to call someone they weren't with anymore. Speaking of....

She pulled out her phone, rapidfire typing a message out to Johnny, nothing too detailed, the usual 'it's not you it's me,' BS that people fed whenever they just weren't that into someone anymore. She hit send quickly, turning her phone on silent and tossing it into her desk drawer. There, that was done with too. One less thing she had to work on later, one less distraction tonight when she needed to be on her a-game.

 _gotcha_ was Carisi's almost immediate response to her message, already waiting there for her when she looked back up to her computer. She was about to hit the close button on the message when another appeared and stopped her. _Must not be a very smart guy then._ Followed by a smiley face. She shook her head, but smiled a little bit to herself, glancing over her shoulder to meet his gaze. When he looked up at her, she shook her head at him, but still kept the smile on her lips. Okay, so maybe he wasn't the _most_ annoying person she had ever met. 

The van ride to the house was quiet, everyone seemingly thinking over what was going to go down tonight at this house. There could only really be two outcomes, Dani rationalized. There was the good outcome, where everyone left alive and the bait was taken. And there was the bad outcome where their guy wasn't even there and people got hurt. It was easier for her to think of things in black and white terms sometimes. That way, she was able to separate her emotions from the job. Things either _were_ or they _weren't_ , and when there were only two options it was a lot easier to know what she needed to do. In this case, for example, she needed to make sure everyone got out of there alive.

The next moments were a blur. One of the men dressed in all black, holding an assault weapon, kicked down the door, he and his teammates filtering into the white, broken down house. Dani, Sonny, and Amanda followed in suit, pistols raised. As the filed through the house, Dani checked the first room; empty, except for a washer, dryer, and pile of clothes. The second room, not so much. Four beds filled the warmly lit room, each occupied by a screaming girl, none of which could have been more than sixteen, holding up pillows in front of themselves like shields.   
\  
"Hey, hey, you're okay," Dani called out, her voice sounding as if it weren't entirely herself. She put her gun in it's holster, holding up her hands, then extending one out in peace. "You're okay, we're here to help." The girls, one a brunette, two blondes, and a girl with red hair all stared at her, blinking, tears forming at their eyes. "Let's get you out of here," she said softly, extending a hand towards the one with the fiery hair. Cautiously, the girl extended her hand out, grasping Dani's, and suddenly she was lurching off the bed, wrapping Dani in a hug, sobbing. Dani froze for a moment, remembering what this moment had been like for her, years ago. Slowly, she began to run a hand over the young girl's hair soothingly. "You're okay," she said again softly. "You're all okay."


	9. Chapter 9

_Seventeen years, nine months, and twenty two days ago_

The young girl stood in the basement, right handcuffed to a water pipe, standing on her very tip toes, trying to see out of the slit of a window. The majority of it was covered with black paper, but the bottom portion had started to peel away. She thought she might _just_ be able to see the outside world if she angled herself just right, but the handcuffs only had so much give before they started to tear at the flesh of her wrist. So she gave up, sliding back down to the floor in a heap, letting the tears slide down her face. She was going to die down here, she was pretty sure of it. There was no way she could escape, not with her hand cuffed tightly to that pole. The lady upstairs was the only one with the key, and Anna was pretty sure that _she_ wasn't going to be letting her go any time soon.

Ever since the lady had dragged her down her to film that video on her phone, for whatever reason she needed (Anna didn't really understand the purpose), the lady hadn't let her back upstairs. The ducktape had gone away but it had been replaced with hard metal handcuffs. The only thing she could really reach was a gross old toilet in the corner near where she was chained, for which she was grateful. There wasn't much to do down there in her dark little prison, except sit and wonder why her Daddy wasn't coming to get her, the way the lady had told her he would. Anna could see the lady was upset about the change of plans, too. Maybe she didn't _really_ want to keep Anna prisoner. Maybe she didn't have the choice. Anna hadn't been quite taught yet that people were the worst. She hadn't yet been hardened to the outside world and found that anyone who could hurt you, would hurt you. The time would come, though. She would learn.

So she sat down there, waiting, wondering. Feeling the most lonely she had ever felt in her life. After all, if no one was coming to find her, no one must care about her. Right? That was how it felt, certainly. Abandonment seared at her soul, leaving burn marks on her heart. She wanted to be free again, she wanted her little brother again (even though she used to feel like he was the most annoying thing on the planet). She wanted her bed and her stuffed animals and her dad. And she wanted her mom to not be dead.

Sometimes her mom came to her in her dreams, telling her that everything was going to be okay, telling her that she raised a strong daughter and that if she just kept going, she would pull through. Sometimes the dreams turned to nightmares where the blood started to spill out her mothers stomach, coating the long, white dress she was wearing, her face rotting away into just bone. But other times, her mother curled up next to her where she lay on the floor, wrapping herself around her daughter like a blanket, singing her lullabies and reminding her that she was loved. Those dreams would haunt her long after she left the basement. Those dreams would follow her around for as long as she lived. 

She wished she had fought back more. Maybe if she had told the guy behind the counter at the gas station that she had been kidnapped then maybe, just maybe, she wouldn't be here right now. Or maybe if she had taken that chance to run, out into the woods, into the unknown, she would have found a road and been able to find a town, and a town where she could have maybe found the police. There were a lot of maybes, and a lot of wishes she had left floating in her mind. There wasn't much for her to do down there except for think. Sometimes, when the lady upstairs would turn on the TV, she could hear the shows she was listening to. Whenever the news came on, the TV went off, though Anna wasn't sure why. Some days she thought maybe the lady had lost her mind. 

Anna would draw out stories in the dust on the floor to pass the time, telling herself epic tales of superheros and princesses and trips out to the ocean where the water was so blue you could see the little fish everywhere. She got incredibly good at telling stories, even if they were only to herself. Her tales became so vivid sometimes she thought she saw shadows of dragons on the walls or hear the clanging of swords together, echoing around the little basement rooms. Some days she thought maybe she was losing her mind.

The only time she ever saw the lady was when she brought her food down, once a day. A big meal for her to eat, save for later, do whatever she wanted really. The food was good, really good. Sometimes she had mac and cheese, other days she got chicken. There were veggies as green as she remembered trees being. She would get bottles of water every now and then, too. So she wasn't starving, she didn't thirst for liquids, but she wasn't doing well, either. She started to develop a cough from all the grim down there, always getting in her lungs. It felt like her eyes were always watering. She felt so dirty and gross and her hair was always in tangles and she couldn't get them out, no matter how long she tried to weave her fingers through the knots. All her work only ever seemed to make it worse.

The only time the lady ever spoke to her was when she would come downstairs, a newspaper in hand, and make her hold it so she could take a picture. One day Anna finally got up the courage to ask her why she had to keep taking these photos. It took a second for her mouth to make the words, tongue heavy with disuse. The lady looked down at her and then laughed. "Because I need to prove you're not dead," was her dry response. That was the only interaction she ever had. She was worried she would learn how to speak. 

Some days she would lay there at night and wonder what she had done to deserve this. She wasn't very old. Who could she have angered so greatly that this was no happening to her? She cursed the Gods and the Universe and whatever else she could think of for doing this to her, for doing this to her family. She cried until there were no tears left, and then she cried more. After all, there was nothing else for her to do.


	10. Chapter 10

_Present Day_

"Danvers, Carisi is with you on this one," Liv began laying out orders once they were back at the precinct. They would need to get these girls talking if they wanted to keep the ball rolling. They wouldn't have a lot of opportunity if none of them would speak up. "Let him see what 'sympathetic' really looks like, please," Liv grabbed Dani by the arm as she walked by. Dani nodded with understanding. 

"Ready Dani?" Sonny called from one of the doors, holding two cups of coffee. "Got ya a hot one, figured its going to be a long night," he held the cup out to her as she approached. It may have been black coffee, softened only with cream and sugar, but the thought behind it was nice enough, she supposed. 

"Thanks," she murmured as she took a sip of the hot liquid, practically begging for the caffeine to hit her system quickly. "What's your poison?" She asked, nodding towards the cup in his other hand. 

"Oh this? This ain't for me, figured the kid in there might like something homey. It's chocolate milk," he explained, holding it towards her so she could see. "Maybe it's a dumb idea, but I'm always more willing to talk when someone gives me comfort food." 

"It's not a stupid idea," she said, looking up at him. "I think it's a good one. Also, I'm making note to give you homemade soup some day so I can get you to spill all of your secrets to me," she grinned as she opened the door, sauntering by him, leaving him to watch her wake for a moment, before quickly following her into the interrogation room. She sure was something different, but the kind of different that only kept him intrigued. Plus, given what he had discovered about her last night when he looked at her license, everything about her made so much more sense.

Inside the room, by herself, sat a small girl. Blonde, thin, and pale as winter snow. She looked up at them, almost like a deer in headlights. Dani knew that feeling, all too well. She could remember sitting on the other side of the table before, as she slid into place. She recognized her as one of the girls from the room she had entered. "Hey there, my name is Detective Danvers, this is Detective Carisi. We're here to help you." She tried her best to offer the girl a smile, but she was fairly confident that it came out more grim than intended. 

"Here, I brought some chocolate milk," Sonny offered, setting the cup down and sliding it a little closer to the young girl as a peace offering. As he did so, Dani studied the girl, watching for signs of acceptance. 

The girl's mouth hardened into a thin line. "I don't want that. I'm not a child. I'm not talking to you, I'm waiting for my lawyer to come," she said firmly, though there was a slight waver in her voice. 

"I know you want to believe it," Dani spoke resting her hands on the silver table in front of them, "But Joaquin probably isn't sending one for you. He's downtown right now, and he's speaking with the police. He's telling them that he didn't have any clue that you were turning tricks out of your room with the other girls," she shook her head sadly, a couple strands of brown waves falling from her ponytail as she did so. "Now I don't think that's true. You can't be...what? More than fourteen? I don't believe that you got into this life by yourself. Tell us what he did to you, how you got into this mess. We can help you," she met the girl's gaze, hoping to all hope that she would listen, that they hadn't brainwashed her so much that she wouldn't even save herself.

The blonde girl stared at her for a moment, unmoving, not speaking. There was a little quiver on her lower lip as she eyes Dani, thinking. Finally, she spoke again. "I don't need your help. Any of you." Dani sighed, shaking her head, fighting the urge to sink down in her chair. Obviously, it wasn't the girl's fault she was so caught up in this. But that didn't make it any less frustrating.

"No?" Sonny spoke up, leaning forward and reaching into the breast pocket of his green shirt, pulling out something small and black. "Well, we got your phone in the raid..." he looked at the screen, before setting the small, black phone on the metal table and sliding it towards her. "You might not need our help, but what about your daughter?" Dani looked down at the lit up screen on, the closeup of a baby, small, eyes closed, the tiniest of fingers curled up, illuminated the background. 

Dani studied Missy in front of them, as she cautiously reached out, picking up the phone in shaking hands, staring at the image of her baby girl on the screen. "We raided a house last May," Dani began, "There were children inside. We got them out." She looked Missy in the eyes, shaking her head. "There were no babies in that house tonight, no kids. But right there," she pointed at the phone, "Is your baby. So tell us, Missy. Where is she? We can get her out safely, too. Or do our damnedest trying." 

Missy looked upward for a moment, blinking away tears that were trying to come out of her blue eyes. With a sigh, she looked back at them, then tentatively reached forward, picked up the glass of chocolate milk and took a sip.

Dani looked over at Sonny, a small grin quirking at the edges of her lips as he met her gaze. Turning back to the young girl, Dani asked if she might want some food. Missy nodded eagerly, still drinking from the cup. "Great, we'll go get some for you, okay? Just stay right here, we'll be right back." 

Sonny reached forward and picked the phone back up, even though Missy seemed reluctant to allow so. They couldn't really have her in a room alone with a cellphone. The two detectives stood up and Sonny grabbed the door, holding it open for her so they could exit together. Dani glanced back over at Missy before she stepped out, offering her a small smile. Surprisingly enough, the blonde smiled back.

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Outside the room, Sonny raised his hand up in the air in her direction. "Great job, I think we got this one in the bag. The food stuff? The chocolate milk? Comfort, love it," he grinned at her. 

Dani rolled her eyes, but raised her hand and gave him a highfive, the crack of their palms smacking together echoing down the hall. "Well, I figured she could use something nice, something that reminded of her home, if she can remember where that was." Dani's mind, for only a second, jolted back to eating mac and cheese on a tattered couch, when she was let up from the basement for a small reprieve. She blinked, turning away. That wasn't the kind of intrusive thoughts she needed with her right now, not when she was trying to negotiate. 

"Well, I'm going to go make her a sandwich or something, whatever I kind find in the break room I guess," Dani shrugged, putting her hands into her back pockets and looking up at Sonny. "Are you going to head back in there?" She nodded towards the door they had just come from.

"Yea, think I will," Sonny replied, crossing his arms over his chest. "Chat a little more with her about her kid, see if I can get anything," he grinned over at her, his eyes locking onto hers. "Seriously though, that was some good thinking in there. I think we made some real headway in getting her to talk." 

Dani smiled back at him, her lips pressed together into a thin line. "Yea, well, it's what I do, ya know?" she shrugged, then turned away, heading for the break room, feeling him watch her as she walked away. It was what she did, it was always what she did, especially with victims who were held captive. She always found ways to connect with them, without really giving up why she knew so much what it was like. It was what made her such an asset to the team, what made her skill set so versatile. And she enjoyed it. If she could bring more kids home, she was going to do anything in her power to do so. Each one they brought home made living her life the way she did, slightly more bearable.


	11. Chapter 11

_Seventeen years, eight months, and two days ago_

**Footage Found in Gas Station Leads to DNA Testing**

_A grainy, black and white image pulls up on the screen in front of me. The TV screen is small, the video footage, smaller. I am sitting in the back area of a gas station, watching the footage that lead to the most recent break in the Danvers murder/kidnapping case. A gas station clerk sits with me, fidgeting nervously as if she is the one who had done something wrong. I asked her about it, and she just shrugged, looked down at her hands, struggling to find words for a moment._

_"I guess I feel responsible. Like if I had paid better attention to the news or something, I would have recognized her face, known she was missing. I feel like I could have done something, but I just didn't know any better." She looks at me again, this look of remorse on her face. She's only nineteen, and she's already learned the weight of guilt, even if this tragedy truly wasn't her fault. That sort of thing is easy when the kidnapping a child and murder of her mother is involved. There's guilt everywhere. Everyone feels it._

_Seeing this video, it's hard to really make out exactly what happens. A small girl enters, uses the restroom, and comes back out. She looks like she's heading for the exit, but then she stops and does something really mysterious. She frowns and waves sadly up at the camera. At least, it looks an awful lot like a frown, but it's hard to really tell for sure with the grainy video. And then, she does the key thing that's helped the investigation. She reaches up, she takes the fluffy winter cap off of her head, and drops it to the ground._

_She makes no attempt to talk to the gas station clerk, she makes no attempt to get attention, makes no attempt to run. We don't know why, though we are assuming she was under extreme duress. If we fast forward on the video clip, which I have the clerk do, we see her, the same girl sitting next to me, get up from behind the counter and go to use the restroom herself. But something catches her eye. It's the hat on the floor. She picks it up and looks around, even going so far as to check outside. If you match the inside security footage with the outdoor footage, the vehicle that the girl had came out of was long gone._

_So the gas station clerk places the hat in lost in found, thinking maybe they'll come back for it. It's chilly out, she thinks. But then again, it's just a hat, so maybe it'll just sit there for a few months until it's donated. That's the usual procedure for lost items like this, the clerk tells me. They sit there waiting to be donated or sometimes, sometimes the owner comes back._

_Or until it becomes the next big clue in a kidnapping case. By this point, I'm sure you've guessed that the little girl in the footage is Anna Danielle Danvers, the missing girl. We don't know why she left her hat there, but we do know it was hers. Detectives have reported that their case lead them to this gas station by the tracking of credit card usage and a lucky camera spotting a license plate. So when they saw this footage from that fateful day, they knew they had to see the hat._

_And on that hat, there was hairs, long brown strands from the child's head. They were tested and were a match. 100%. This hat belonged to the Danvers' girl. So she was alive, at least, a couple months ago when this footage was filmed. This is the first hint the case has had in months. If anyone has any clues as to where this missing girl may be, please contact your local police._

_This is Margo Docket, reporting from BTL news, your local station for the latest updates. Thank you, and goodnight._


End file.
